| 1) Think short term.Many people enter marriage with | | | | place. The same applies to marriage.Smarter move: |
| the same mindset they have when buying a car. A car | | | | Never in the history of couplehood has there been |
| is designed with something called "planned | | | | greater access to information about marriage, men, |
| obsolescence" in mind. You know that one day it will | | | | women, relationships, communication, and how to love |
| wear out and you will need to get another one. | | | | someone. |
| Entering marriage with this mindset just about | | | | Read a book, hire a coach, go to a seminar, take |
| guarantees failure.Smarter move: Go into marriage | | | | advantage of all the help that is out there.3) Turn |
| with a strong sense of commitment. Not just to "stick it | | | | every issue into a battle for control.This one is really |
| out." Commit to having the best possible marriage and | | | | dumb and very, very common. I have actually had |
| to the growth of the other person.2)Assume you | | | | couples in my office - I'm not making this up - fighting |
| already know all you need to know.When I got married | | | | over the proper way to hang the toilet paper. It's |
| 10 years ago, I had a degree and license on my wall | | | | almost as if there is a scorecard somewhere, perhaps |
| that said I was a marriage therapist. So I assumed I | | | | on the fridge, keeping track of who wins the most |
| knew all I needed to know about how to have a good | | | | battles. My question is, what is it that you win?Smarter |
| marriage. Boy, was I ever wrong.I'm grateful I've | | | | move: Pick your battles. Instead of fighting for my way |
| learned a lot in the last 10 years. I hope my wife and | | | | at all costs, work hard and creatively for designing "our |
| clients are too. Think of it this way _ how successful | | | | way" of doing things.Visit for more tips and tools for a |
| would you be on your current job if you assumed you | | | | great relationship, including a free 10 day e-program on |
| knew all you needed to know and were resistant to | | | | improving your relationship today. |
| learning or changing? Your job would not be a great | | | | |